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(pssst, there’s goodies in this post for you)

Writer's picture: John BrandtJohn Brandt

Congrats for reading my emails for this long %first.name%!


(Only fellow email marketers will get that lame dad “joke.” And, ugh, yes, I did that on *purpose* but yanno, sometimes you gotta explain the best jokes.)


Anywho:


I have a goodie for you for opening this here email.


No, I’m not gonna give you a free course.


No, I’m not gonna give you a free ebook.


No, I’m not gonna fly to where you live and entertain you for a day.


I got something even better.


Now, you might not learn nothing. But that’s oaky, learning nothing ain’t no fun anyway.


Today, we’re just gonna have raw, unadulterated, dad-inspired fun. (There may or may not be a point to all this…)


Here’s the gist:


I have an article pulled up in the tab next to me.


It’s chock full of 145 of the all-time greatest dad jokes. And I’m gonna copy and paste the first 10 that make me laugh below and call it an email hahaha.


They’re gonna be corny. And, who knows, they might even be funny.


Okay, let’s have some mf fun shall we?


Warning: These jokes are not funny. Continue reading at your own risk.


1. “Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?" "In case they get a hole in one!”


2. “What does a sprinter eat before a race?" "Nothing, they fast!”


3. “Dad, did you get a haircut?" "No, I got them all cut!”


4. “What kind of car does an egg drive?" "A yolkswagen.”


5. “I tripped over my wifes bra. It appeared to be a … booby trap.”


6. “I have a Polish friend who's a sound technician. Oh, and a Czech one too. Czech one too. Czech one too.”


(Oh boy, this is harder than I thought…)


7. “Why did the man fall down the well? He couldn’t see that well!”


8. “What's brown and sticky? A stick.”


9. “Today, my son asked "Can I have a bookmark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name.”


(I’m on the 15th page of Google….)


10. “I used to be able to play the piano by ear, but now I have to use my hands.”


Whew, that was much harder than I thought.


The point of this tomfoolery?


There ain’t one.


There’s three:


1. If I made you chuckle (which is much less than a full-blown laugh, let alone a cackle), you either gotta * Book a call right here (if you have a business with a proven offer)

or

* Join my email list right here (if you don't have a business with a proven offer)


2. I wanted to get a chuckle outta you. (Maybe I did, but if you’re like me you probably cringed more than chucked.)


3. Being entertaining in your copy beats “providing value” 100 times over.


Do with that what thou wilt.


And if you wanna see how much money goofy emails like this can make for your brand, book a call.


John


P.S. Got a favorite dad joke? Reply back with it and make me cringe like I made you!


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