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Biz opp head shot

I got a bone to pick with the biz opp industry today.


Nay, I have a mf shotgun shell waiting for its fictitious head.


And in the words of the great Ye:


ITS ON SIGHT.


Why am I going after an entire industry?


Sit down and checky:


The biz opp industry is threatening my family… Y’see, my aunt—who never had a business bone in her body—has somehow caught the biz opp bug. She’s been neck deep in “research” about the usual biz opp suspects. Things like:


* Affiliate marketing


* Getting rich online quickfast


* Building a list


Yesterday, she called me while I was on a walk and asked me about a lead magnet. She admitted shortly after that she had no idea what I did professionally, until she dove into the wild world of biz opp.


But here’s the thing:


She’s getting duped by this industry of circle jerking gurus. She’s never had a real skill before. She has NO idea what she wants to sell. And yet, these circle jerking gurus are giving her delusions of grandeur. She thinks that all she has to do is click a few buttons, invest some money in lame ass courses or AI, and boom, money will come into her bank account in droves.


And worst of all?


(At least for me, who likes to keep in lowkey…)


She keeps calling me for advice. Being my family, it’s my duty to put her in her place: Every time we talk, I temper her expectations. Because making money online is never as easy as your favorite guru makes it seem. There's a reason they make you feel like it’s easier than a broad with daddy issues.


The reason?


They’re trying to sell you their course, silly.


In fact, check this out:


One of my aunt’s “partners” (if you can call her that…) has fallen even deeper down the biz opp rabbit hole. My aunt told me that she has stacks upon stacks upon stacks upon stacks of notebooks filled with notes from her attending free webinars. She’s invested decades into learning affiliate marketing. And she’s done absolutely nada with the knowledge she has.


Because here’s the sick, demented truth about these biz opp morons:

They know their target audience. They know that the people attracted to biz opp industry are the folks who will never implement anything. So, they prey on these suckers by overwhelming them with info, creating shitty courses that prob won’t work because the people buying these courses are allergic to action and implementation.


It’s gross.


Anyway, during my call with my aunt, she wanted me to give her lead magnet ideas, so she could “build a list” because that’s her latest fascination.


My answer?


It depends.


(She was not happy with this answer.)


She wanted me to create a lead magnet idea, out of thin air, without knowing what she wanted to sell or who she wanted to sell to.


How in the blazing fvck am I supposed to help with that?


She then wanted to give away my book to build her list. I told her no. Then, I asked her why would people who would buy Lululemon leggings—which is the closest she got to defining what she wants to sell and who she wants to sell it to—want a book about email marketing product launches?


Then, she wanted to trade lists with me. Again, despite the illegal nature of such, I said absolutely not. Again, what do people interested in email marketing or using email to improve their ecom brand have anything to do with people who might buy Lululemon leggings from your affiliate link have in common?


Absolutely nothing is the correct answer.


She’s thinking about this whole thing in a back-asswards way. And it sucks I gotta come in and be the voice of reason because she’s let circle jerking gurus dupe her into how she can make millions of dollars without having the two fundamental pieces of having a business down, namely, knowing what you want to sell and who you want to sell it to.


Worst part?


She hasn’t done anything with her “business ideas” yet. She gets too overwhelmed. She doesn’t know if she wants to give a free sample away (a free sample of what? I asked), give a discount code for her Lululemon affiliate link, give away stuff she doesn’t own (i.e. my book), create a TikTok channel, incorporate her dog into the business, buy a domain, build a website, design a logo, etc. etc. etc.


Even worse-er?


We talked about this in detail more than 4 months ago. At the time, I told her to try a bunch of shit, fail fast, and learn from your mistakes.


She’s yet to try anything. She’s yet to fail. And she’s no better off for it.


In fact, she mentioned several times during our call that she just wants someone to hold her hand and help her. Well, if someone can hold your hand and basically build a million dollar business for you, why wouldn’t they just do it themselves? (Spoiler alert: They would.)


There’s a lot of good business lessons embedded in this rant for those wise enough to see it.


Anywho:


Already have an ecom business and want to scale faster than a biz opp guru can prey on the innocent?



John

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